Date posted: February 9, 2009

Friday,  February 6, 2009The Best of the Week February 2 – 6 The Howard Stern Show for February 6, 2009RON HOWARD CALLS TO DISCUSS FROST NIXONOPIE & RICHIE AVOID THE TRAINWRECK

Ron Howard called in to thank Howard for recommending “Frost/Nixon,” so Howard laughed that at first, he thought it was a stupid idea for a movie – it took a screening to change his mind. Ron said he had the same reaction before seeing it on stage. Howard also congratulated Ron for not following 90% of the other child stars in becoming just another trainwreck, but Ron confessed that he may have had some help: “Thank god there wasn’t TMZ [back then].”


Ron noted that he spent so much time directing and producing – his next project is “Angels & Demons,” a Tom Hanks vehicle – that he had little time for hobbies or home time. Howard and Robin wondered how he started his busy career, so Ron explained how infamous B-movie director Roger Corman wanted him to act in a film, and instead of agreeing to the original terms, he negotiated a deal to act in exchange for the privilege to direct “Grand Theft Auto.”

[note: this photo of Greg Fitzsimmons is the closest thing we had to one of Ron Howard]

RON ON CHRISTIAN BALE’S BLOW-UP

Howard asked Ron what he’d heard about Christian Bale’s on-set meltdown (Ron’s daughter, Bryce Dallas Howard, was acting opposite Christian at the time of the incident), so Ron explained that it was not Christian’s nature to blow up: “But it’s intense on a set.” Ron said the whole crew got back to work on the film the next day, and according to Bryce, the finished product is “fantastic.”

ARTIE BUYS SOME PEE (MAYBE) AND ARGUES WITH GARY

ARTIE BOUGHT CLEAN URINE

Artie confessed that he purchased urine after offering to take on-air drug tests last month: “I paid $500 and I told the kid – he’s trying to get on the fire department, you know. He said, ‘This is brutal. I haven’t done anything in six months’ – He put it in a Poland Spring bottle and I transferred it – with gloves – into something else and wrapped tinfoil around it and hid it behind a couple whiskey bottles.”


Artie laughed that he carried the urine in his jacket for a while in case the show sprung the test on him – like during Dr. Drew’s interview: “If you look at the tape, you might be able to [see it]…I was always wondering if the urine stayed [good]. And someone else mentioned something about not having a cold urine sample…so I put it in a room with heat.” Artie said it eventually went bad: “The urine got real dark as the days went on…I was like, ‘Does this even look like real urine?’”

ARTIE ALWAYS TELLS THE TRUTH…EVENTUALLY

Howard opened the show noting that the guys on the Wrap Up Show questioned the truth behind the story Artie told late yesterday about paying some kid $500 for clean urine. This set Artie off: “Oh Gary wants brutal honesty?…God knows why you’re here, you f’ing asswipe.” Artie claimed, “You always get the truth out of me…Eventually.”


Gary wasn’t surprised by Artie’s reaction: “I knew this day would come. Artie will eventually turn on everyone here.” Artie also took a couple swipes at Will, so Will came in to defend himself: “I don’t think it’s that ridiculous to say you lied yesterday. Your track record isn’t that great.” Artie angrily turned his attention back to Gary and repeatedly mocked his role on the Wrap Up Show: “I can’t wait to hear about how you booked Richard Lewis in 1986.”

THE ARGUMENT PHASE ESCALATES, DIES

Gary responded to Artie attacks in kind: “You are literally dead to me so far as the Wrap Up Show goes…Don’t f’ing talk to me….This is the real Artie. This is who Artie really is.” Howard speculated that Gary was so upset with Artie because he loved him so much. Artie admitted the feelings went both ways: “It hurts more with Gary.”

Artie added his half-truths were usually innocent: “That’s life! You lie about shit! Have I embellished stories to make them funnier? Yeah. But I didn’t lie about buying piss.” Howard shrugged and confessed that he was disappointed to find himself in the post-fight analysis phase: “I liked the argument phase.”
FLAVOR FLAV IN STUDIOFLAVOR FLAV IS ALREADY DOWN ON YOU

Flavor Flav stopped by to promote his “Nite Tales” DVD and asked Robin if she was running for president: “You’re behind the bulletproof ‘boof’!” Flavor added that he felt partly responsible for Obama’s presidency: “A Jewish president is next!” Howard wondered if Flavor had a tough time dating Bridget Nielsen: “Did you go down on her?” Flavor laughed: “I was already down on her! She’s 6′2″ [and] I’m 5′8″!”


Flavor told the crew that he lost his virginity at 6-years-old: “We were experimenting, man…natural instincts.” Flavor laughed that he hasn’t stopped since: “My three oldest…they live out on Long Island [with their mother]…my middle three [with their mother]…they moved up to Albany…my last one, his name is Karma…he lives with me [and his mother] in Las Vegas.” Flavor said planned to keep going, as he wanted three more children.

LIVE FROM CELL #3432

Howard asked if Flavor if he still talked with former rap partner, Chuck D, and Flavor claimed he did: “There were times when he was trying to get up on my [VH1] show.” Howard also wondered if Flavor would consider a return to radio. Flavor said he might – and noted that he used to work with Lisa G at Hot97: “Lisa’s always been single, man…honestly, I think Lisa’s scared. I think she’s scared of love from a man.”

Flavor noted that he was the only radio host to ever broadcast from jail, adding that his longest sentence was for two-and-a-half years: “I know it was wrong, what I did. But back in the day? I was the man!…The gang I was in, some of the stuff I had to do.” Flavor told the crew that he faced some tough guys in prison: “They thought they’d make a name for themselves and beat up Flavor Flav…This was in the sixth building. The sixth building of Riker’s Island.”

JOHNNY KNOXVILLE BROKE HIS PENIS

JOHNNY KNOXVILLE SAVED STEVE-O

Johnny Knoxville stopped by to promote his new MTV show, “Nitro Circus,” and Howard told him he looked good – much better than the last time he came in (right after “Jackass 2″ had wrapped). Howard asked how Steve-O was doing, so Johnny said: “Fine! He’s been clean and sober since after we had him in 51-50′d…he’s done amazing.” Johnny told the crew that toward the end, Steve-O was doing a whole laundry list (including hundreds of Whip-it canisters) of drugs every day.

Johnny added that he had an easier time getting Steve-O into rehab than he thought the show would with Artie: “You better have some big dudes with you.” Howard asked how Johnny had succeeded in getting Steve to rehab, so he explained that a bunch of Steve’s friends decided to help – the last straw was Steve threatening to jump a mini-motorcycle from his apartment window onto the roof next door: “We got 7 or 8 or 9 big guys…I took the camera from him and said, ‘You’re going and we’re taking you.’”

A SINGLE JACKASS ROAMS HOLLYWOOD

Now that Johnny’s divorced, Howard finally got him to comment on all the celebrity women he’d been photographed with during his marriage: “I never got so far out of control…but I hurt a lot of people, honestly.” Johnny said he’d since met a new girl and hardly ever leaves her side. Howard asked what Johnny did to his wedding ring tattoo, so Johnny held up his finger, confessing: “I got it lasered.”


Johnny denied ever hooking up with Kate Moss: “No. I knew Kate…I know Kate. She’s very nice, but, uh…” A caller disputed Johnny’s account, saying he was actually in rehab with Kate when Johnny came to visit, so Johnny admitted: “I did visit her. Yeah. Uh…” Howard mentioned Lindsay Lohan as well, but Johnny claimed he’d never banged her either – they’re just victims of media speculation: “I don’t think that puts me in any, uh, in any exclusive club anyway.”

STICK THIS UP YOUR PENIS TWICE DAILY

Johnny told the crew about how he tore his urethra during a stunt, explaining how he has to flush it twice daily by sticking a tube into his penis – all the way up to his bladder (only 10 – 11 inches). Johnny claimed the process prevented scar tissue from constricting: “In the beginning it was [difficult]…it’s not that bad anymore. I’ve gotten used to something horrible.” Howard was appropriately shocked, and Johnny sympathized: “It’s not cool…I’m just like, “Ok, this is a consequence.’” Johnny added that breaking his arm or leg never phased him, but breaking his penis got his attention.
Friday’s Show

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