Marcia, marcia, marcia – The Howard Stern ShowThursday,  October 16, 2008MARCIA, MARCIA, MARCIA The Howard Stern Show for October 16, 2008THE TOP 10 HOTTEST GUYS AT HOWARD’S WEDDINGHoward started off the show telling a story about Beth going out with Jill Martin last night and returning with Jill’s list of the top 10 hottest guys at the Stern wedding: “As I was listening to it I realized I don’t give a shit.” Howard went over the list for Robin anyway:

10.Tom Chiusano.

9. Richie Notar.

8. Ralph.

7. Grant Reynolds, Jillian Barbarie’s husband.

6. Randy Kemper, Tony Ingrao’s boyfriend.

5. Daniel Benedict.

4. Pat Monaghan.

3. Rob Zombie.

2. Mark Consuelos.

1. John Stamos.

Robin agreed with most of the list, but took issue with Ralph’s presence on the list.
MARCIA BRADY DID WHAT FOR COKE?Maureen “Marcia Brady” McCormick stopped by to promote her new book, “Here’s the Story,” and told the crew that her relationship with Eve Plumb (aka “Jan Brady”) was different than most thought: she was always jealous of Eve (Eve’s boobs were bigger).
Howard noted that the book’s coke stories are making headlines, and Maureen laughed that coke turned her into a slut: “I was if they had coke…I felt like I could do anything.
I felt like I was perfect.” Howard noted that Maureen once even let a guy videotape her nude, and Maureen admitted it was true: “I was 18 or 19.” Howard then appealed to the audience: “If anyone has that tape, can they send it to me?”
GREG ALMOST TOOK MARCIA’S CHERRYMaureen told the crew that cocaine use wasn’t her only youthful mistake – she also planned to lose her virginity to Barry Williams (aka “Greg Brady”):
“It’s really weird. And I’m glad we never did it…his parents walked in on us…I didn’t do it so I must not have really wanted it.” When asked about her current relationship with Eve Plumb, Maureen confessed:
“We don’t really have a relationship…she was my best friend when we were doing the show. I loved her…we would undress in front of each other…I [jokingly] said that I kissed Eve [on a late night show] and she hasn’t spoken to me since.”

HOWARD WILL BE MISERABLE AT JASON’S WEDDING

Howard noted again that he was planning to attend Jason’s wedding and was already starting to feel miserable about it: he thought the drive to Hacketstown, NJ, was 45 minutes, but now people are telling him it’s at least an hour and a quarter…each way. Jason came in to say he didn’t want Howard to be there unless he wanted to be there, so Howard said he still planned on coming. Artie then offered Jason a choice: his presence at the wedding or a gift of $5,000. Jason was unflappable: “Artie, I’d love for you to be there.”
GO TO CANCER CAMP TO LOSE WEIGHT

Colin Quinn stopped by to promote his upcoming stand at Caroline’s and told the crew that his recent trip to fat camp was depressing:
“A lot people there were pretty sick. Cancer and stuff.” Colin claimed he lost 25 pounds:
“I’m been swimming…it’s like a ’70s diet: a lot of salad.” Howard asked if Colin still had chatroom sex, but Colin claimed he stopped a long time ago. Howard was surprised, as he thought Colin’s been doing a lot of stuff that’s beneath him recently, like Killers of Comedy road gigs. Colin replied, “No, [it's] the really high and mighty people I feel superior to.”

Colin complained about touring with some of the Killers of Comedy veterans, like Shuli, Iron Sheik and Beetlejuice: “They’re taken in like the broken toys of society.” Artie noted that Sal is pissed about Bob Levy’s new “Ultra Killers of Comedy” line-up, which gives Sal and Shuli’s slots to Colin and Jim Florentine.
Colin shot back that Shuli recently hijacked a show, doing a 45 minute set: “He said he was sorry, but I can tell he wasn’t sorry…He’s supposed to 20.” Shuli came in to say it was the one time he forgot and went too long: “I never go over…You’re a bitter man.”
MIKE WALKER’S GOSSIP GAMEHoward got Mike Walker from The National Enquirer on the line, as he does every Thursday, to play “The Gossip Game,” in which Mike reads four gossip items – three (allegedly) true, one false – and the crew has to guess the fake. Mike then read this week’s stories:
1. Russell Crowe angrily rejected an offer to remake “Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid.”

Anti-drug ads don’t work.
Ryan O’Neal was charged with drug possession yesterday. Guy Ritchie is gonna get rich.
Linda Hogan has a special wish for Bubba the Love Sponge.
Ringo Starr has explained that he’s sick of people who repeatedly send him things to sign.
Nancy Reagan fractured her pelvis.

Playboy will no longer be producing DVDs.
Sex offenders in Maryland can’t give out candy on Halloween, but they do get nifty orange pumpkin stickers to let everyone know they aren’t allowed to give out candy.
There’s a $75 million prize for the researcher who develops the first non-surgical way to spay and neuter pets.
A Florida man was arrested for cruising the bars in Ybor City, FL dressed as Batman…because there it’s against the law to wear a mask in public, except on Halloween.
The final Presidential debate was last night.
Ed McMahon is now a rapper.

Howard tuned into Beth’s appearance on “The Rachael Ray Show.”
Howard played this clip of CNN’s Kyra Philips saying “c–t.”
Steve Langford reported that the Washington Post’s Howard Kurtz thinks this LATimes article is a hack-job.
Colin Quinn said he usually voted for a third party.
Eric the Midget called in for some reason but never got to it before Howard hung up on him.

Tim Sabean claimed he was busy editing down the Friar’s Club’s Gary Roast.
Gary and Artie talked about their respective episodes of “Mancaves.”

Thursday’s Show