Tracy morgan is free – The Howard Stern ShowWednesday,  October 29, 2008TRACY MORGAN IS FREE The Howard Stern Show for October 29, 2008ROBIN ADMITS SHE WAS WRONG – 8 YEARS AGOHoward started off the show bragging that Robin was wrong about karma yesterday – and then read a ton of emails supporting his argument. Robin insisted that karma still had something to do with “environment and culture” but Howard didn’t want to hear it: “You hate being wrong…Tell me something you did wrong.” Robin answered that she was wrong the other day when she drank too much and 8 years ago when she voted for George Bush: “I really didn’t like Tipper Gore.”
THE STATE OF HOWARD & RALPH’S UNIONHoward played a clip from yesterday’s Wrap-Up Show of the staff trying to figure out his friendship with Ralph and decided to settle the debate: “Here’s the truth about my relationship with Ralph: I’ve never really hung out with Ralph all that much…I see Ralph socially once – possibly twice – a month…There was a time when I was single and there was this posse when we would go out and Ralph was a part of that.” Howard explained: “I still consider Ralph the guy I like to hang out with most. But I don’t really hang out with him a lot.”
Howard added that the relationship’s shift was mostly Ralph’s fault: “I started inviting Ralph to stay [over at my Hamptons house] and every time there was a problem…You need a team of people to entertain Ralph…There’s a lot of neediness.” Robin asked if Howard thought Ralph was jealous of his other friendships, but Howard did not: “No…I just think he’s a difficult houseguest.”
GET ‘EM WHILE THEY’RE HOTHoward laughed that Artie-Lange.com is advertising cock-rings, and Artie acknowledged it was true: “We’ll sell [ads for] anything.” Artie told the crew: “My agent came to me and said we get enough hits to the point where we can sell advertising.
He asked me if we could sell porn and I said, ‘What do I care?’” Howard asked Artie if he was going to follow through on the Website’s promises, like an “Artiecam” (no – that’s just footage JD shoots backstage) and a blog (”I wrote one last week…I feel so embarrassed…blogging’s for fags.”).

Howard went live to Joey Boots’ apartment for the Craptacular II, where Shuli – who was reporting live (through a gas mask) for the Howard100 News – said neither Joey Boots or High Pitch Erik had shat yet.

HowardTV brought up the feed on the in-studio monitors and the tableau disgusted everyone. Howard laughed that it looked like a snuff film. Producer Jim McClure (who was overseeing the segment’s production on-site) began vomiting: “I love you Howard, but I don’t know how much longer I can do this.” Howard replied, “I don’t blame you…Shuli, good luck.” Artie was confused: “Is this not indecent? Where’s Ted Stevens when you need him?”

Tracy Morgan came in to promote the new season of “30 Rock” and bragged that he was off probation: “No ankle bracelet! There’s no cops in here, right?” Howard asked how Tracy’s love life was going, so Tracy confessed that he recently broke up with his girlfriend: “I don’t need to be with anybody who’s got a guilty conscience.”

TRACY’S PICK UP LINESA caller asked if a recent tabloid report about Tracy’s behavior at Prince’s house was true, and Tracy said it was: “I woke up on the couch and he and his wife were at the door telling me, ‘You got to go’…I grabbed him by the shoulders and told him, ‘My father loved “When Doves Cry”‘…then I smoked a blunt in his driveway while the sun came up.” Tracy then laughed that he met his girlfriend by telling her “Hey baby, I want to get you pregnant.”
PLEASE DON’T OGLE THE MIDGETEric the Midget called in to congratulate Johnny Fratto on his newborn son and threaten to burn the show yet again: this time he was angry about listeners coming by the studio to watch his upcoming appearance. Howard said he knew Eric was going to show up anyway: “You’re in show business now, pal. It’s all about people looking at you.” Eric replied that he was fine with the in-studio crew looking at him, but not “stupid assholes off the street.” Howard dismissed Eric’s concerns again, and Eric obtusely said “whatever” before ending the call.
PAUL MOONEY Paul Mooney stopped to say hi and showed off his new coat which Howard thought looked like it came from a wolf: “It’s paid for…it’s not real [fur], but it could be.” Howard asked Paul if Obama winning the election was Martin Luther King’s dream, and Paul said yes: “I think it’s great. America will truly be America.” Paul added that Obama wasn’t going to solve all his problems: “The girl I was dating had a baby. And it wasn’t my baby. So we broke up.”

Paul (as “Negrodamus”) also predicted that Robin will be married by next year at this time, but Howard doubted it, as Robin has always claimed she’ll never marry. Robin laughed that her opinion had changed: “I’m not gonna lie…I thought I would be with Mr. X for the rest of my life…I’ve been single a long time. It’s time to try something else.” Howard asked if Robin would also now consider adopting a child, and Robin said she would: “I’d consider anything.”

Those skinheads who wanted to assassinate Obama also wanted to behead 14 people. Britney Spears’ father has been given an indefinite conservatorship over her affairs. Led Zeppelin might reform with a new singer. The Olsen Twins won’t do much at their book signing.
California’s Proposition 8 might have been funded by the Mormon Church.
Red is the color of romance. David Duchovny is begging Tea Leoni to take him back. Joaquin Phoenix has given up acting. Michelle Obama’s wardrobe is thrifty. Carol Alt is suing her ex.
The stock market gained 900 points yesterday. Cloris Leachman was voted off “Dancing with the Stars.” Howard said Joey Boots’ apartment looked like Buffalo Bill’s pit in “Silence of the Lambs.”
Steve Langford reported that Riley Martin had re-signed his contract with Howard101.
Howard asked people in the New York area to look for Leah Walsh, a former Stern Show intern who is missing on Long Island.
Paul Mooney noted that Lenny Bruce’s mother was the first female stand-up.
The crew looked at pictures of Tracy Morgan’s girlfriend.
Artie referenced the work of Judah Friedlander.
Tracy Morgan joked that he’d dated the entire cast of “Flavor of Love.”

Wednesday’s Show